This is going to be a long one. I know. Straight into the deep end. Right now I am typing this in my brother’s room because I do not have my own laptop. But thinking of it if I had a sponyo as we are calling them nowadays I would be typing this from my mac book or that’s what I think. I am a very liberal person. I try not to judge people and their lifestyles. Whatever makes your boat float or makes you sleep well that’s all you do you.
So this new era of sponsors is really picking the pace. I actually have no problem with people having sponyos (this referrers to both female and male sponsors). The problem I have is this people being sponsored giving the rest of us pressure to keep up. So imagine yourself being a 20something year old just done with campus or still in campus or just working earning almost a decent salary. Campus life was one of my best moments in life. I would actually go back so long as I don’t have to do exams.
There is where I met my first love. I know right awwwww!! NOP! It ended pretty badly but that’s a story for another day. So in campus I was actually in Kenyatta University the town campus. I was so naive. Can you imagine my reason for choosing the town campus was that I can be in town daily??? I was so excited to always be in town that I never wanted to go to the main campus along thika road. I even changed my course from law to Business!! AKI ANGAI USHAMBA! So to cut this story short I enjoyed campus not because I had lots of cash but because I had no pressure from anyone to keep up. The people I used to hang out with had almost the same pocket money as I did. So if we wanted to buy a pizza or a drink we could save from Monday to Friday and we contribute (changa) and buy what we needed. We dressed up the way we wanted. We could buy clothes in the street in the evening at 100 bob or 200 bob. That was life in campus.
Fast forward to 2018!!! We live in a society where our role models are socialites and video vixens and not the old school teachers, doctors, business ladies, lawyers etc. Being in campus right now or actually being below 35 years right now is like survival for the fittest. You are expected not to repeat the clothes or the shoes you wear. You are expected to be driving or taking an uber, taxify, Mondo whatever means of transport but not a matatu or a nduthi (Motorcycle) or else you will be referred to as a low class. We are in an era where owning a car means you are a rich and riding in a matatu shows that you are poor. The same generation that asks you what you do for a living so that then gauge the amount of respect thy can give you. This generation believes in the make money fast motto. Get rich fast or die trying literally!
Let me be fair, Sponyos are not only for campus girls or boys. They are for everybody below their age which can range from a 17 year old to even a 40 year old. The pressure we get from our peers I think is what drives us to look for sponyos. For example, let’s say I have a friend called Jane. Jane is the same age as me we have hustled together for a while, we are pretty close-ish. She might be employed somewhere part-time or full time but I tend to think this people are mostly employed part-time or self-employed. I am saying this because this people are always on the move and I don’t think there is an employer somewhere who will be giving you all those leave days. So Jane still stays with her parents or has a 1 bedroom or a bedsitter somewhere in this Nairobi. Jane meets a sponyo maybe at an event. Fast forward to a month later Jane starts travelling to coast, Tanzania, South Africa etc. etc. Living her best life.
Jane starts reducing her hangouts with her regular friends. She changes her whole wardrobe. She is now only rocking designers and hanging out at Bclub or Kiza taking lit Hennessey and Bellaire. Bottle service only. If you have been to Bclub or this other high-end clubs in Nairobi you will know that this bottle services cost an arm and a leg around 80,000 Kenyan shillings not Zimbabwean dollars and above. Nobody has a problem with Jane drinking this expensive drinks. The problem comes in when now this Jane person starts to pressure people to keep up with her lifestyle. Their instastories and WhatsApp stories are always lit. #Livingmybestlife #moneymoves #youcantsitwithus #balling #slayyyyying
She starts taunting her friends telling them they are not working hard enough and that’s why they are not living the good life. Three months down the line Jane moves to Lavington or Kileleshwa to a 3 bedroom house with a swimming pool and even a garden. She gets a new car, a bunch of human hair collections and an iPhone X. She invites you over to her new house for a house warming and a night out with the girls. You get to the house and it is fantamagorgeous!! She goes ahead to tell you safaras (broke B’”@>” %) how you are not using your brains to make money. You clearly know that Jane’s job cannot cater for all this expenses but you don’t want to ask how she gets her money lest you be thrown out for being jealousy. You are there feeling so low and as if you are wasting your life doing what you do for a living but you just smile and sip your champagne lest she kicks you out and you only have 300 bob for a matatu to town and back to home in rongai, syokimau,kitengela or kiserian.
So you and your 8-5 job or your self-employed job you start doubting yourself. You are like what am I doing wrong? Why am I not getting a lot of cash? Small small yaaani kidogo kidogo you find yourself looking for Jane so that she can hook you up with a friend of her sponyo because when you went to Bclub after the housewarming party Jane got drunk and told you all her secrets. Jane tells you you need to dress to kill. She has told her gukabae to bring one of his friends for you. You meet at a nice five star hotel. Shock on you!! This sponyos are as old as your dad or even older. You sit down to have a chat you are feeling disgusted as f”@@$# because you can’t handle it while Jane is there caressing her gukabae like nothing is wrong calling each other mbebi.
You decide that that is not your cup of tea so after the meet up you never hit anyone of them up. Anyway life continues you go back to your daily hustle. A few months later Jane calls you asking for a place to sleep. You agree. She comes over crying with matutas (the lines you do underneath your wig or weave) on her head. Long story short is the sponyo tokad her (left her) and got a new mbebi. He took everything he had bought for her because she was not even smart enough to ask that the things be bought or be written under her name. Jane starts at zero or even a negative five. Jane is kind of lucky because she is alive. Others are never lucky to get out alive. The sponsor can kill you for fear that you are going to destroy his name out there or their wives can kill you we all know it has happened before.
So now u see life is really tricky. We cannot all come from wealthy families. I come from a pretty decent family in that at least I get meals and a roof over my head. I got the education I need, I am currently working in an 8-5 job, I have access to a car, I can afford an uber when necessary but I tend to use a matatu more often because it is much more economical. Pressure comes from all angles. I like the good life very much but if I can’t afford it currently I will not beat myself up. I have been in situations where I had to struggle to fit in moneywise and trust me the pressure is real. I Thank God for my 8-5 because it really saves me from a lot of pressure. I have friends who would to party Monday to Sunday but because of my job I tell them I can only be available on Saturday or Friday. This saves me from overspending money I don’t have. I the past one year and a few months I have hanged out with the same crew on all my weekends. We will not break a bank to support our habits.
I really have no issue with people with sponyos all I am asking is let the rest of us live our lives at our own pace. We are all different and God has planned our lives differently and we will all turn out differently. Enjoy your life travelling, eating the best food, having the best phones, cars etc. but stop pretending you got it on your own. To be honest if I had to get all those things you are getting with no string attached probably I would have a sponyo but that is just a dream lol because we all know you have to pay for them one way or another. I believe in marriage and family. So it will be breaking my heart knowing that I am sleeping with someone’s husband while his wife and children are at home waiting for him. The guilt will kill me. But I guess this girls don’t give a f*%@ about the guilty. Money will wash it away. Society will give you pressure to get married, buy a car, move out, get babies, have a flat tummy yaani the list is endless. The society will pressure you but will not give you a single cent to start your life with. You have to hustle on your own. There is really no shortcut to success you have to take the stairs.
To sum it all let me just say live life at your own pace. Life is not a race. Everything will fall in place. Slowdown. Do not compare your chapter one to someone else’s chapter 20.You can be happy with all the things you have accomplished rather than dwelling on what you think you should have already completed. Do not let social media and this sponsor generation pressure you.